Medical Misogyny: to all the doctors who didn't believe me

Medical Misogyny: to all the doctors who didn't believe me

To my local women’s primary care office,

Remember me? I called you only a gabillion times. I was really sick and you wouldn't see me because it was early in the pandemic. Maybe that was okay after just a week or two of being sick, but after 6 weeks – didn’t you think something might be wrong?

Okay, okay, I get it. You were worried about the new virus and didn’t know how to stay safe. But couldn’t you have come up with something? A phone call with a doctor, urgent care, or even some at-home labs? You say you provide “a complete approach to women’s health”. I am going to call BS. Within 10 minutes on a telehealth appointment with another local PCP, they sent me to urgent care.

Something was wrong. I told you something was wrong. Why didn’t you believe me? 

Sincerely, 
Stuck in sickness

—- 

To the endocrinologist at one of the best hospitals in the country,

You almost killed me because you weren’t thinking. I had already been sick for a year. You ran those tests without even thinking that you had kept me on steroids for months. Of course that impacted the results. 

After you called, I had to buy one of the medical alert bracelets. I went everywhere with emergency steroid syringes. I was worried about the common cold, a bad scratch from my temperamental cat. You told me any of that would send me to the ER. It could send me into adrenal shock and kill me. 

You kept me on all those meds. It would have taken 30 seconds to check my chart, and maybe another minute to realize you weren’t getting accurate results. 

Now, I struggle to trust doctors. I struggle to believe them, I get second opinions, I spend hours reading the latest research. 

You broke my trust in the system that is supposed to care for me. I thought I was going to die. Why didn’t you think to check?

Sincerely,
Mistreated patient 

—--- 

To the malpractice lawyers I called after the misdiagnosis, 

You told me I was in the right! You agreed my misdiagnosis was egregious. You knew the doctor messed up and caused real damage. 

But there wasn’t enough money in it for you to take the case. This system, too, is one of profit. 

And I would risk being blacklisted at the best hospital in the city I love, putting myself and my family at risk in the future. 

Sincerely, 
Unrepresented plaintiff 

—- 

To every doctor who told me to lose weight,

Yes, my body changed during this experience. I gained weight and I can even tell you why, although I don’t owe you an explanation. No, my weight was not the reason I was sick. 

Yes, I have chosen an intense career path (#founderlife). I have dedicated myself to helping women take control of their health. I started a company with my friend at 25 and now we’ve built a nationally-recognized brand. I work hard, I feel stress. No, my stress was not the reason I was sick. 

Why did you give up when you saw in my labs something was wrong? No amount of stress or “extra pounds” could cause what was happening to me. 

Yes, I am sick. No, it's not my fault. 

Sincerely, 
Gaslit girl

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